I Have Completed Final Fantasy 2

The final dungeon in Final Fantasy 2 is called Pandemonium, and I now consider it to be one of the most challenging sections of any old school RPG. Pandemonium is a 10 floor dungeon, but you had to traverse an 8 floor dungeon called the Jade Passage to even get to Pandemonium, with no rest stops or towns or even access to a save point in between. So basically, FF2's endgame is a gargantuan 18 floors of the most difficult and punishing random encounters that the bestiary can provide. Add to this the fact that items don't stack, limiting you to a 50 item inventory and Pandemonium turns into a punishing test of resource management.

Like most retro role playing games, Final Fantasy 2 has an unreasonably high frequency of random battles. For 18 floors, I counted my steps between random battles and the furthest I went without fighting was 6 steps, and that only happened twice. The fights are brutal, just see above. This is a random battle that I received probably a dozen times in Pandemonium. 3 Fenrirs, 2 Frost Lizards and a Great Malboro. Final Fantasy vets would immediately go for the Malboro, fearing it's ability to inflict you with any and every status effect within the game, but the Fenrirs are the deceptively deadly ones. They cast Muddle, a status effect that makes you attack your own party, you know, the party that you've been building up all game, the ones with all of the ultimate weapons? It's a terrible handicap that makes you spend elixirs and ethers post-battle. 

The final boss is the Emperor, and you start to see some of the foundations for the more memorable moments in future Final Fantasy games. The final asshole is an Emperor just like in FF4 and FF6, the airships and steampunk themes start creeping in, and the final battle is in space! The Emperor here is tough, but I used a Blood Sword, a strategy that not all retro Final Fantasy fans use, but I swear by it. Every Final Fantasy game released before 7 has some version of a Blood Sword, a relatively weak weapon that heals the user the equivalent of the damage it deals. The damage output of these swords becomes obsolete quickly, but I find wielding one, (especially in a game like FF2 that allows your characters to dual-wield) slightly tilts the math in your favor. Firion never requires healing, ever, he restores every turn, leaving me with just the burden of managing three party members' hit points instead of four. Firion is in charge of resurrection too, as he is the guy most rarely killed. Also, I suspect this but have found no confirmation, but I think The Emperor is designed to go after the party member with the highest HP, so I had very little trouble with him. He damaged Firion every turn it seemed, and I was able to keep his health at a comfortable level. 

Just like the original Final Fantasy, FF2's real final boss is the dungeon you must defeat in order to get to the final boss. The Emperor survived just eight rounds against a team that I wasn't particularly confident in.

I know for certain that I will never play Final Fantasy 2 again. It is in no way harder than FF1, but the original has so much history behind it, the story of how it saved one of the most influential game developers from going bankrupt. Final Fantasy 1 is important, FF2 wasn't even released in the United States until well after Final Fantasy 8 had come and gone. FF2's stat system sucks, it's too easy to exploit and almost forces a player to give up on offensive magic altogether. I will however, take a little credit for beating what is probably the worst game in the entire series, twice.

My Online Pokemon Deck Has Leveled Up

I've talked about how genius the Pokemon Trading Card Game Online is before, because of it's level playing field. You can't buy cards with your silly Earth money, you can only buy randomized packs with coins earned from within the game itself. Yes, you can exchange promo codes found in real packs of Pokemon cards that can be exchanged online, but again, it only provides you with a randomized pack of cards, nobody automatically gets anything, and I love that.

I've been battling my way through online ranked matches, buying a new booster pack every time I scrape 100 coins together, and tweaking my deck here and there every time I get a new card good enough. My last booster pack happened to have my very first EX card, Tornadus. I got super fucking excited, immediately planning on how I was going to make him the keystone of the deck. However, if you look close enough, you'll quickly realize that Tornadus kinda sucks. Jet Blast is a move that requires 4 energy and only deals 60 damage, the output increases by 30 for each Plasma energy attached to him. I have 2 Plasma energy, and thats after 25+ booster packs. I decided to leave him out of the deck, he's more trouble than he's worth.

Then like beautiful serendipity, I opened another booster pack 100 coins later to discover a Kyurem EX card. It's unbelievably powerful, and just like every EX card, it's hard to maintain. I threw him in the deck and switched some stuff around to make it a lightning/water theme.

This new deck led by Kyurem EX is now 2-0. As you can see here, I got Kyurem EX out early against Physicist77, a guy with a much better record than me. I settled in, got a couple energy retrievals, and started picking his Pokemon off one by one. 

Kyurem EX was never knocked out, and stayed healthy for enough turns for me to get a Blastoise powered up on the bench just in case. I never needed him.

I am so excited about this new deck I've compiled. The versatility of Eevee along with a Master Ball and my new mighty Kyurem makes me extremely confident for the next tournament coming up.

My Ten Favorite Pieces Of Final Fantasy Music

A video game's soundtrack might not be the most important aspect of the experience, but it certainly isn't the least important. Some of the greatest games and the moments within are defined by the music that accompanies them. Final Fantasy and Nobuo Uematsu are pretty much the supreme overlords of video game music, so I wanted to share my absolute favorite tracks from across the franchise, and hopefully help some of the newer gamers aware of some of the masterpieces that preceded them. 

10: Quina's Theme FF9

When you wander into the marsh and meet Quina for the first time, this music takes over the scene completely. Every time I did a QTE about Quina or saw a clip from Quina's past, I would get so excited to hear this badass music. Tribal drums plus monkish chanting with a sprinkle of keyboard silliness. It fits Quina perfectly. 

9: Mysidia FF4

Final Fantasy 4 was for a long time my answer to the "favorite video game of all time" question, and this is the best tune from that epic game. It's a town of wizards, of random townsfolk who have been changed into pigs and toads. It's silly, catchy, and a necessary distraction from the slaughter Cecil brought Mysidia in the game's beginning. 

8: Cosmo Canyon FF7

Final Fantasy 7 is all about fast paced plot development, grueling boss fight gauntlets and the beautiful moments of peaceful serenity in towns between all the action-y parts. When you arrive at Cosmo Canyon, you have just survived the Gold Saucer prison and watched Barrett's best friend die. Junon was a debacle and you had to fight Sepheroth's 1000 mom reincarnated as a lump of sentient flesh in the bowels of a rusty cargo ship. Also, your car broke down in the middle of the desert. Cosmo Canyon offers relaxation, great stores with powerful weapons, and greets you with this awesome ass song. I love Cosmo Canyon, putting my feet up and watching the gang get together around the fire to discuss their next move. This song represents the last great feeling of hope, because after Cosmo Canyon is Nibelheim.

7: The Republic of Bastok FF11

In FF11 you get to pick your starting city, and I picked Bastok, the city of industry. This song plays the second you login, and as the cityscape unfolds in front of you, this song kicks in and you are filled with ambition. The 3 starting cities are in competition with each other, and it always seemed that us players from Bastok were consistently the most successful. I credit the Bastok theme song for that.

6: The Landing FF8

Final Fantasy 8 has the greatest soundtrack in the history of video games. It is a work of art, and every track perfectly describes the images that run along side the music. The Landing is a heart pounding orchestral power that makes Squall's first military deployment that much more tense. I love this song.

5: Crossing Those Hills FF9

It's the overworld music, the song you hear as you traverse the landscape, going from town to dungeon, or chocobo forest to treasure location. I love the way this track makes you feel as if the FF9 universe is infinitely massive. 

4: Blitz Off FF10

Somehow, someway, Uematsu developed a song for Blitzball that actually sounds like it's underwater. Amazing. 

3: Shuffle or Boogie FF8

This is the theme for the best FF side-distraction ever, the Triple Triad card game. This music plays in my head when I pull up next to someone at a red light. I think of this song when I feel challenged by someone, or whenever I play any card game whatsoever. Another monumental song from such a monumental OST.

2: The Sky City Of Bhujerba FF12

I love peaceful town music, Bhujerba's theme from Final Fantasy 12 is so serene. Bhujerba is a very unique place, a city floating amidst the clouds, and exploring it for the first time while hearing this music wash over you is a gaming moment I will never forget. 

1: Besaid FF10

This is my absolute favorite piece of music that Nobuo Uematsu has ever produced. FFX has a lot of island-y music, and Besaid's is the perfect theme for an island town. It's slow-paced and elegant. Besaid is the first town in the whole game, and it immediately makes you feel the pain that Spira as a whole has been suffering with along with that stark optimism that these islanders feel despite all of the heartache. When you think about what a video game's song is supposed to do, like make a boss fight feel more epic, or to help the player mourn the death of someone, Besaid's theme music is supposed to accurately represent what the town is all about. Mission accomplished.

(I know that I only added a single retro song to the list, but let's be truly honest with ourselves, midi chip bullshit cannot stand toe to toe with full orchestras. Get over it.)

Hopelessly Addicted To Hearthstone

World of Warcraft: Hearthstone is a card game that I was going to pass over because of all of the internet claims that it was too similar to Magic. I love TCGs, in fact I spend a significant amount of free time with card games, but I always get a little suspicious of systems that borrow too much from Magic The Gathering. Magic is perfect, and the standard by which others are measured, so I'm always skeptical when a new system tries to do it better.

Hearthstone is not Magic. It has found some rare system all it's own, and I am hopelessly addicted. You pick a class, Priest, Druid, Warrior, etc each with their own type of deck. Cards cost mana, ranging from 1 to 10, and on your first turn you have only a single mana to spend. Every turn your mana pool increases by 1. This is the cleverness behind Hearthstone, you can do more each turn as your mana grows, ensuring that no match plays too long. Have you ever been trapped in a Magic duel that lasts an hour? By the time your mana pool in Hearthstone reaches 10, you are throwing out game-ending creatures and trying to survive your opponent doing the same. At that level, with that much mana at the players' disposal, matches end quickly, and chaotically. 

Hearthstone is brilliant, unique, and FREE. You can spend real money to unlock all of the single player quests immediately, allowing you to battle to unlock special cards sooner, but all of that can be done for free too, just by painstakingly earning coins to spend instead. Of course, my rule of thumb is to pay the free game if you like it. Heartstone is great, and even better than all of the positives that I mentioned, the game is narrated by a drunk dwarf! What could be more up my alley?

Megaman Air Freshener

Remember when you used to live for shit like the Turtle Blimp? I begged and begged for one but never got it, every Christmas my hopes would be violently smashed. That commercial used to tease me everyday, dangling the perfect toy in front of my shiny, ignorant face.

I've just been spending a lazy morning around the internets, looking at old commercials that made me spend my mom's money. I never grew out of it though, which is why I still get excited when I see my lady driving a car with a Megaman air freshener. 

Final Fantasy 2's Mysidia Tower Is No Joke

I have been slacking a lot on my big Final Fantasy project. I'm still only on FF2, and since I'm eager to move onto the next adventure I tried to make some progress today. I then proceeded to hit the enormous brick wall that is the Mysidia Tower. It's a late game dungeon with ten floors that each take about 15-20 minutes to get through. This is the pivotal moment in FF2 when the game's tiny annoyances become serious problems. As you climb the tower, there are no save points whatsoever, but there are 4 bosses. There are no Super-Ethers or Turbo Ethers in this Final Fantasy, just regular old 30mp restoring ethers that don't stack and quickly fill your 50 item max inventory. You must overload on ethers if you want to survive the Mysidia Tower gauntlet, but the random enemies inside hit you with status ailments that no spell can cure. This means you must take up valuable Ether space in your inventory and replace them with some Gold Needles and anything that can fix Muddle. 

It doesn't help that the game killed off one of your party members in the last dungeon, replacing her with an under leveled Dragoon who is at best a 1/4 as effective as the rest of your team. The first boss is a Fire Gigas, easily beaten and very weak. The next guy is the Ice Gigas, with double the first guy's HP, but with an obvious weakness. The third boss, the Thunder Gigas, is exponentially tougher. His physical attacks can one shot anybody, and he gave me my first game over screen. I came back immediately and tried again, completing the tower with the second attempt. 

Mindu dies!

Barret Wallace: Planet Liberator Or Reckless Terrorist?

Remember the famous Clerks argument about how the rebels in Star Wars were actually the bad guys? The idea is that the 2nd time the rebels destroyed the Death Star it was under construction and thus required a large number of non-military personnel to build it due to it's massive size. This mass killing of innocents, regular citizens of the Empire, added a lot of new ideas to conversations and debate about the Star Wars universe. I remember immediately thinking about Final Fantasy 7 after watching that Clerks argument for the first time, and how Barret's terrorist group AVALANCHE dealt a blow to Shinra by dropping a section of the multi-level city of Midgar onto the citizens below. The game moves on, and it is rarely spoken of again, but that plate fell onto an entire sector of Midgar. There are 8 sectors, meaning that Barret, Cloud, and the rest of the group at the time pre-meditated the mass extermination of 1/8 the population of the largest metropolitan city on the entire planet. Is even Shinra responsible for THAT many deaths?

I suppose that is impossible to know, because we don't know the population of Midgar. I do however, think it is safe to say that it was a number high enough to make you cringe, and definitely large enough to lose the support of every surviving citizen of the city. This is a major problem that I have with Final Fantasy 7 because it causes me not to root for anybody. Shinra is draining the life out of the planet and must be stopped of course, but simply killing more people than they kill is a really stupid way of doing it. If you put yourself in the shoes of the average Midgar-ian I doubt you could find any reason to support AVALANCHE. 

If Barret really wanted to help the planet and stop Shinra, then address the issues that allow Shinra to have so much power in the first place. He killed 1/8 of Midgar's population, thus becoming a Lex Luthor level villain within that city, and seeing how easily Barret came to terms with what he had done makes me suspect that he doesn't really need the support of the common person to accomplish his goals. Is this because Midgar-ians can't vote? The city has a mayor, who directly reports to President Shinra and has no problems admitting that his position has no real power. So do average citizens have no voice?

Wutai has an army, and a government, but what about Nibelheim or Rocket Town? Is the entire FF7 world just a collection of independent city-states? In the Final Fantasy 7 universe, the world is deep into a life changing industrial revolution. The tech is getting advanced, automobiles, motorcycles, airships, power plants, and the population is allowing a corporation to amass power and take over governmental responsibilities. This is what needs to be addressed. Barret and Cloud know firsthand how powerful a group of just a few can be, especially with high-level materia in such abundance. Stopping Sephiroth was obviously the most pressing matter but they didn't know that at the time of the first reactor sabotage. Have elections, fight for the right to vote, use your technology to create a global community, and use these new fangled gadgets of yours to keep every city aware of each other's statuses. The mining population of Bone Village should hear about protests happening in Junon, or the hurricane that devastated Costa Del Sol. If I was a citizen of Midgar, I would applaud the destruction of Sephiroth, I would vote to establish a system of elected officials completely independent of Shinra, and then, angrily, I would hope for the imprisonment of every single evil motherfucker responsible for that collapse in Sector 8.

Positive change needs to come about in a positive way gentlemen. You fucked up.

My First Pokemon TCGO Tournament Didn't Go So Well

The super addictive and surprisingly polished Pokemon Trading Card Game Online held the first alpha tests of it's new tournament system. Basically, the tournaments are split up into 3 groups, pre-constructed them decks, decks containing only current gen cards, and unlimited which allows absolutely anything. I signed up for unlimited, not wanting to be a huge vagina about it and I advanced to the 2nd round where I proceeded to get mercilessly torn apart.

As you can see, I beat Pizzafrank only to lose to ParsifolSA. I earned a booster pack as a "don't cry kid" prize, but I was overall impressed by the efficiency that the new update has added. The tournament was quick, I didn't wait long between matches, and there was no lag to speak of. Of course, as of right now, everything has crashed and the entire game is under maintenance, but hey, I made it to the 2nd round!!

Jaffar Is A New Favorite

Risen 2's Jaffar is a character I'm going to dearly miss. Easily the best part of the entire game, Jaffar is a gnome who learned to speak English by listening to pirates exclusively. What you get is a sweet gnome-kid who likes to pick pockets, and can't say more than three words without cursing. Instead of "okay", he says "Fuck yes!" His voice actor interpreted this character to be oddly similar to Yoda, but it doesn't make Jaffar any less funny. He wasn't the best crew member to bring along with you to fight  a monster with, but his dialogue ensured he never remained on the ship. Watch the video below, and enjoy Risen 2's most unique character.

50,000 Gamerscore!

I finally hit 50,000 gamerscore yesterday, a feat 7 years in the making. The achievement that put me over the top? Detective from Risen 2: Dark Waters, it's worth a measly 20 and an unavoidable cheevo unlocked simply by progressing through the story. Sometimes your biggest moments can be so anticlimactic. 

The Little Things I Appreciate About Risen 2

This blog is basically just a diary of my journey through video games, and the latest oasis is Risen 2. This game has completely surprised me by appealing to my inner old school RPG fan. The game has gotten some pretty lukewarm reviews, so I wanted to point out a few little things that this very difficult game do to make the experience so very fun instead of so very frustrating. 

The fast travel system in Risen 2 is perfect. When you arrive to a new location, you don't even have a map. Getting this map becomes priority #1, and then you must discover each important place to unlock it for fast travel. Remember, this is a game that can kill you quickly and without warning, so standing in front of a dense jungle for the first time, knowing you must comb through it to find the important locations is always scary. The feeling of dread is great for the first time you trek through the thick jungle, but if there was no fast travel, you'd have to traverse wide, deadly areas multiple times with repeated deaths a guarantee. I heard that the first Risen did not have fast travel, I'm glad they showed some mercy and corrected that.

The buyback system in this game is AMAZING! Risen 2 allows you to sell almost anything, but later on you start discovering quests and find blueprints for crafting weapons that require items you had previously, but dumped on some merchant ages ago. Every single merchant in this game has a list of everything you've sold to them. Unlike other similar RPGs, the items on these lists do not expire or get wiped clean when a new chapter begins, or when the story progresses. Every item that you have sold to any merchant stays on the buyback list for the duration of the game, and the best part? The buyback cost is what you sold it to them for, not the retail price. Brilliant.

You have a crew. They stay on your ship while it is in harbor, and you may take one of them with you at any time to help you fight. The story isn't affected much, sometimes they throw a joke or two into the middle of a conversation, but their combat AI is truly impressive. I take Venturo mostly, and he does exactly what I need him to do, stay back, and snipe with a rifle. When you take Patty, she jumps into the meat of it with you, swashbuckling and taking aggro. Your party members do not need healing, cannot die (if they take enough damage, they just drop to the ground until the fight is over) and actually make a difference. Can't kill the Grave Spider on the first island? Come back with a shotgun and a party member who also has a shotgun and fix that.

Risen 2 is mainly about exploration, and the game loves throwing secret areas for you to stumble upon. What I love about this game is that every cave, every suspicious path leads to something worthwhile and meaningful. While just returning from a fetch quest, I stumble into a tiny little cave, not even on the map, that has a huge voodoo altar, a 12 foot zombie guard that I have to shoot, and a huge amount of l00t. This is also a great way to find the greatest of all video game finds, permanent stat boosts!!

Every game has a lock picking gimmick now. Some of them make you want to kill yourself (Bioshock 2). Risen 2's lock picking system is better than most, you just slide your pick left and right until every tumbler is elevated, and you're done. It usually takes about 3 seconds. There are a lot of things to unlock in this game, and I'm glad they didn't a big fucking deal about it.

Back In My Day...

My son Oliver has two favorite movies; Despicable Me 2, and The Lego Movie. He watches one of them everyday, can quote any scene from either film, and talks about them constantly. Oliver has seen Planes in theaters, and loves both Cars movies. I watched Up with him recently, and we cried together. At the risk of sounding like some geriatric Mylanta addict, kids these days have it so much better than we did.

I know kids today sexually mature quicker, the drugs are far more deadly than ever and our government now watches us pee, but I had animated movies like Ferngully when I was a child. Have you ever brought a piece of childhood nostalgia back into your life as an adult only to realize how awful it is? It's like finally meeting your childhood idol, and Bo Jackson just punches you in the stomach. Ferngully is one of those punches. Sure, we had good animated movies in the 90s, The Brave Little Toaster, The Iron Giant, An American Tale, but have you seen modern animated films? The Toy Story series has been nominated for an Oscar, and had anything similar to The Incredibles existed when I was young my nerdy little brain would have exploded.

Sometimes I worry about my kids growing up not appreciating the things I do. Sure, I want them to be passionate little liberals like me who love Tolkien and Star Trek way way way too much, but I don't want them to have to sit through Rock a Doodle. Movies aimed at kids are far better than they ever have been, so fellow parents, stop pushing Ninja Turtles or Fraggle Rock on your disinterested children and watch one of their movies with them. You'll like it a lot more, I promise.

Why Risen 2 Is So Good

Risen 2 is a great game. Every review that I've read about it however seems to place it in the mediocre to slightly above average range. Now, judging Risen 2 based purely on technical issues is a guaranteed way to give it a pedestrian score, but there are far more important things that it got right. Risen 2 has nailed vague little specifics that most games never acquire. I agree that the graphics are outdated and sometimes choppy. Yes, the menu system is a mess and adds some frustration to the already steep learning curve. There are more problems to be listed of course, but unlike games that got more hype and higher ratings, (Kingdoms of Amalur just sprang to mind) Risen 2 has somehow managed to make every little victory, every good piece of equipment, every accomplishment no matter how impactful, feel special.

Risen 2 has this beautiful blend of old and new. Instead of feeling like a 100 part fetch quest, Risen 2's quests feel unique. They have the new-gen RPG complexity to them with that classic Metroid backtracking. There's a chest in the very first city that requires a thief skill of 90 to lock pick open. Your skill starts at 0, and you soon realize that you gain about 5 points per 3 hours of gameplay. That chest is long away from being opened, so I play Risen 2 with a pen and paper, recording every thing that I wasn't skillful enough to open when I first encountered it. It's a great feeling, bringing me back to those old Ultima or Phantasy Star days where I wrote down everything of importance. I love games that demand your full attention.

I guess what I like most about Risen 2 is that its difficult and slow. It takes forever to build up enough toughness to slay even some of the easiest monsters. Beating this game is something you have to dedicate yourself to, and it takes lots of planning. Gold is precious, you'll never have enough. Everything is extremely expensive and even treasure chest quests give laughably small payouts. Provisions (or health potions) don't actually heal you, they just begin to regenerate you, which is a problem at first because you have no way to save yourself in the middle of a fight-turned-bad. Rum however, heals you completely and instantly. Finally, a pirate game that makes rum the most valuable resource. It's hard to find, expensive, and as soon as you drink it you realize that it is far more important than anything else. 

Risen 2 just has this great feel to it. I don't think modern gamers younger than me will have the patience for it, but I promise that the experience is totally worth it. Do you miss games like Summoner or the original Fable? Jade Empire, Legend of Dragoon? Risen 2 is 5$ on Xbox Live right now. Buy it.

So Close

I got my first Xbox 360 in 2005, and now, 9 years later I am about to hit 50,000 gamerscore. My opinion on whether or not achievements are a positive thing has certainly fluctuated over the past decade, but I have recently decided that I like them. A lot. When you spend a decade with a system, racking up tens of thousands of points, achievements act as a diary. I thumbed through my achievements this morning, seeing the first acquisitions, such as Crackdown's kill every gang boss cheevo, or that impossible Transmissionary achievement in Dead Rising that i never had the patience to acquire. I got every achievement in Bioshock, and Skyrim. I'm missing just a single cheevo from Fallout 3, reach level 10 with neutral alignment, a feat simple to complete but boring to sit through. In 2005 I was fresh out of high school. 9 years later I live in a different state deep in a 6 year relationship with Stephanie. I have 2 kids now. When I look back at all those games, I can picture what was going on in my life around me at the time I was playing them. I was stoned in my dirty bachelor apartment with my alcoholic roommate when I played Bayonetta. I was alone in my first apartment ever, eating beef ramen in the dark when I played Alan Wake. I was rocking Oliver in his basinet with one foot while I played Deus Ex. 

I'm about to hit 50,000 gamerscore, and I'm pretty sure my new obsession, Risen 2 is going to be the game that does it. This is more than just a number, it's the perfect ending to the most important 10 years of my life.